Welcome to The Bully Action Guide

 

Welcome to The Bully Action Guide: How to Help Your Child and Get Your School to Listen, by Dr. Edward F. Dragan.

Dr. Dragan has spent more than 40 years in education as a teacher, school superintendent, and an official in the New Jersey Department of Education.  As the founder of Education Management Consulting, LLC he is now a legal consultant and an education expert for high profile school bullying cases.  He has appeared on NBC Nightly News, Today on NBC, PBS’s One on One, The Morning Show on FoxThe Operah Show and others.

The main purpose of this blog is to educate parents and others about bullying and provide the appropriate tools to fight the bullying epidemic and save lives.  We hope to publish excerpts from the book and lead discussions that will help you get involved or take action.  We will cover most recent news on bullying and other education relevant topics.  Please be patient with us as we work to set up this blog and enrich it with important information that we hope will be a resource for all those seeking guidance.

Here is what others have said about The Bully Action Guide:

“This book is an indispensable tool and support for parents of children dealing with bullying issues in school. Ed Dragan empowers parents to take action and protect their children from harassment and teaches them to intervene effectively with teachers and principals.”–Jodee Blanco, New York Times bestselling author of Please Stop Laughing At Me

“In my work I see many understandably frustrated parents become desperate to figure out how to enlist the school when their child is bullied. How should they approach the teacher? What happens if the teacher won’t recognize the problem? What should you do if the school refuses to do anything to stop the bullies? The Bully Action Guide fills a critical gap in the resources available for parents. Not only does it provide clear strategies for when to approach educators but how. The book is filled with simple yet powerful scripts for parents to use to clearly communicate their child’s rights and hold educators responsible in a way that gives the parent the best chance of working in collaboration with the school. I am strongly recommending this book for all parents.”—Rosalind Wiseman, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes

The Bully Action Guide is a must-have for anyone who is concerned about a child being bullied. Offering calm but effective dialogue templates, a “chain of command” hierarchy to follow when results aren’t forthcoming at one level, and tips on what to document and how, Dr. Dragan provides the steps to help both parents and authorities communicate more effectively.”–Cheryl Dellasega, author of Mean Girls Grown Up

The Bully Action Guide is a priceless resource for any parent, grandparent and family member wanting to ensure their child’s safety.”–Maureen Healy, author of 365 Perfect Things to Say to Your Kids

“A most important book for any parent whose child is being bullied! No other book gives parents such sensible, easy–to-follow guidance for helping a child who’s being bullied, and effectively communicating with a school to end the bullying. A must-read.”–Naomi Drew, author of No Kidding about Bullying

“Bullying is not a rite of passage; it is abuse that must be stopped. Dragan skillfully provides “how to’s” that parents can follow to protect their children at school. Who to call, what to say, questions to ask and scripts to follow – words so potent that they cannot be ignored.  You want this pro on your team in times of trouble. He is telling you exactly how schools operate and how to get what you need. Listen and be safe!”–Mary Jo McGrath, author of School Bullying: Tools for Avoiding Harm and Liability

“Dragan’s book places into the hands of parents orderly, common sense procedures to effectively communicate with their child and with the school to end bullying. It is time for a step-by-step proven system to give parents the edge when dealing with school administrators and teachers. This book gives parents much needed tools, so that schools will not only listen to them, but act to stop the bullying for their child.”–Brenda High, Co-director and Founder of watchdog organization Bully Police USA

Comments

  1. Ed and company,

    Hi I’m Sensei David Laggini from New Jersey! I just finished your amazing book! Let me take a moment to say Happy Holidays and kudos and accolades to you for publishing the book. My book: Blackbelt Landlording has a similar approach regarding bullying from landlords, room mates and tenants.

    My karate schools I’m especially vigilant to promote anti bullying as our kids AND adults are subjected to violence and hate every where we look.. I’m also a bounty hunter. Sad to see 14 year olds already getting inked up and ingesting heroin, smokes and booze. Our mission across the country is to get as many students enrolled in martial arts as possible to we will have a more peaceful and respectful world. Will check in again and keep up the great works. Much obliged
    David T. Laggini – In New Jersey

  2. What a great resource for parents trying to work through an often resistant system when a child or youing person is being bullied. I share your concern that despite many attempts at seeking support for the victim, schools and their personnel do not offer a systematic and planned intervention of rall concerned. I also offer support and resources for victims of bullying and the people who care for them. I would love you to read my book “Childhood Bullying: A Deadly Serious Matter”.Go to my bullywatch website to download free e-books and other materials to help with bullying and cyberbullying.

  3. Julie D. says:

    Where is the information and support for students who are bullied by their teacher? This happened to my son and I had to take him out of school and get him a home school teacher. Several classmates got very psychologically sick (including suicidal planning). Apparantly, this has been going on for 10 years. How can this be? How do 10 year olds handle teacher bullies? What do parents do when they have tried everything seemingly possible? Where is the research, the awareness, the training, the law enforcement, etc.? This issue needs public attention now.

    • admin says:

      @ Julie D.
      Unfortunatly, this is not an uncommon scinerio. Most of the time we think of bullying between kids and don’t ofter realize that kids being bullied by their teacher happens more frequently than we think. Adults are even more adept at hiding their mean behavior toward students–especially when the teacher’s supervisor is in the room. It’s also not unsual for those kids who report the bad behavior of their teacher to be doubted. After all, this is a trained teacher who should know better. This is an adult who is supposed to be protecting my child from bullies not bullying him.

      My granddaughter is a child with Down syndrome who will be celebrating her Sweet Sixteen Birthday next month. One day, on the way to the bus, the teacher felt that Victoria was not listening and took her to a “time-out” room. During a call to Victoria’s mother, the teacher said, “If she doesn’t listen, you’ll have to pick her up from school. She won’t be allowed to take the bus. By the way, when she was in the isolation room she took off all her clothes and was screaming and banding on the wall.” Victoria isn’t able to speak clearly because of an expressive language disorder. She wasn’t able to tell her mom that the teacher had put her in a six-by-six-foot cinder-block room at least four times recently for “fooling around.” Victoria’s inability to communicate clearly frustrated the teacher and led her to bully Victoria.

      This is what I did:

      I called the principal the next day and reported what had happened and asked for a meeting with all involved. The meeting was held the following day. At the meeting, through my questioning, the staff admitted that Victoria had been placed in this room before without any thought to a behavior plan and without notifying her mother. She was also excluded from the class 24 times during the year for, what the teacher said, was misbehaving. Again, there was no notice to her mother and no plan for helping Victoria to modify this behavior. I informed the school that this is not to happen again and that Victoria was to have the services of a behaviorist to conduct a functional behavioral evaluation and develop a plan bascilly to releave her teacher from the stress she was experiencing and the resulting bullying she was inflicting on Victoria. To the school’s credit, but reluctently, it followed through. I didn’t have to take the issue any further.

      When I was a principal in an elementary school I started receiving calls from parents complaining that one of my first-grade teachers was yelling at her class. One parent told me that her child had started wetting the bed and was waking up with bad dreams. Other parents had similar stories. I had no idea what was happening in the classroom. Every time I observed the teacher she was on her best behavior. However, I had a meeting with her and told her what parents were reporting to me and said that this is behavior on her part that is unacceptable. I also required that she receive a psychological evaluation to determine if there were any issues that would interfeer with her ability to be a kind and supportive teacher to her first-graders. Although she never spoke with me again there were never any more complaints and the kids started to like her.

      The first is an example of a parent confronting the school and the school complying. The second is of an administrator who confronted a teacher with her reported bad behavior and she changed.

      This doesn’t always happen, as many parents might experience.

      Teachers are supposed to be trained to be supportive, encouraging adults responsible for creating a climate in the classroom where students want to learn and feel safe. It sounds like you have been stonewalled by the school–all the way up the chain to the top. You probably did the right thing for you child by taking him out of that situation but you should not have had to do that at your own expense. Sometimes, as parents, we need to make these decissions when we feel there is no where else to turn and no one to go to. If I were giving you advice at the onset of this situation I would tell you to document every conversation and every letter and, if it went to the level of the board of education to invite the press when you reported to them. Most schools will do almost anything to avoid bad press.

      Edward F. Dragan, EdD
      49 Coryell Street, Lambertville, NJ 08530 T (609) 397-8989 | F (609) 397-1999 edragan@edmgt.com | http://www.edmgt.com

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Welcome to The Bully Action Guide